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Light falls down like rain, in drifts, torrents ... endless eddies and ripples,
touching the peripheries and edges of place and time, currents of energy infusing
kaleidoscopic sprays of vibrancy and breathing life into moments without connections.
Like blowing the dust from an old reel of monochromatic film, where a single frame is Order custom research paper on This Place
infused with meaning that reaches outwards, touching, caressing... sifting the weight
of time and space from an endless collection of memory.
Moving without destination, places where the energy has departed, leaving something
resembling a faded photograph from some other life, sifting through pools of time -
knowing that the lack of destination and purpose is in itself a lie, because there
are places you dont go, corners you turn and run into blind alleyways, where the
moments never die or fade; seeming to gain strength proportionate to the amount of
effort and years of time that have been spent avoiding them, trying to edit them,
non-exist and kill them out.
There is no distance in memory, everything that ever was - still is, 5 minutes...
5 years, all the actions taken or not-taken, and ultimately... finally, everything
in the near past or non-past, leads back to this place. There is nowhere else to turn,
to move, to escape . . . I have spent years trying, but every brightly-lit superhighway
dead-ends here, and there is nowhere I can run, nowhere to go, no place to hide, where
ultimately I will not re-awaken to this same fucking end-of-time, where all things
terminate and problems have no solutions, because its over, done, finished. And I try
to expend a great deal of energy, telling myself the latter, but somehow it never
seems to change the fact that my soul feels like pieces of bleeding meat hanging
from an electrified barbed-wire fence.
All strength begins in weakness, all craft starts with a spark of desire and a few
stumbling steps forward. But this is the place I have spent years trying to fade-out.
It is a space I arrive mentally, physically, and spiritually exhausted. And it is a
landscape that has come into existence in the not-too-distant past. The concepts of
power and strength are meaningless here. There is no meaning... no reason... no absolution.
Whoever and whatever I think I am, thought I was, and am evolving into, all come to a
standstill here. Here, nothing I ever learned works, and every moment of time, every
iota of energy that has been given birth from this non-space, is always nothing more
than holding up a mirror. Here is where I finally lost, here is where I get my ass
kicked-in every time I even face in its direction, and here is where were going for
a ride, because it seems that all roads lead to this fucking place anyway.
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